APRIL 2015

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April 1

The sweet pain
when we fall in love
becoming more like the quiet
we wake to alone in the middle of the night.
The way the earth is alone, even with a billion
suns around it.
That sweet pain and this heart are all I have
to offer you.

April 2

Ten thousand doors open into heaven
or to a prison cell.
Generosity is withheld from those we cannot bear to look in the eye
when we forget there is no Other.

April 3

We are locked inside a room
and all we need to do is lean against the wall.
Effortlessness, whether in suffering or joy
creates space between atoms.
Knowing this, we pass through.

April 4

Fourth of April
I wake to rain and backache. Pain in the left elbow
become chronic.
In the crown of my head
wood doves mated for life are cooing over their first eggs.

Your face is where I come to live, die and be
born again.
In your face I see the world from a thousand open windows.
Doves are flying out of them!
How the old are always making love
with their eyes.

April 5

You may be tired now but you won’t be tired then.
You may believe you are joyless but you are filled
and over flowing.
You are standing on tip toes trying not to drown in the waves
of this ocean of joy.

I give you my word on it.

April 6

Drops of blood streaming down my arm
follow the same course the River Jordan does
exactly.

The power to receive energy from light
to release it
without effort or intention
is there.
The power to deceive, to corrupt and be corrupted
to believe that nothing we do has any consequences
is also there in the human heart.

Where does it all come from?
God finds it too elementary to explain.
We go on like this until our hearts understand
how to give back what we hope for
exactly.

April 7

My preference is that God look exactly like the one I love
and answer to her name.
Or like the stranger I pass without acknowledging.
The orphaned squirrel who came to the toe of my boot
calling for his mother.
Every leaf of every tree I have seen or not seen.
The sparkling emptiness between stars.
Your right hand taking hold of mine.
My own face in a spoonful of water or your face right now.

April 8

I would like to have something of my Grandfather’s
something small enough to hold in the hand.
He always told me
“To be intoxicated with God is alright
but it is still an intensity of ego
just as joy and rage are both intensities of Awe.
Here, where we are now
is where the love is.”

April 9

Life is the stone we break our hearts upon.
You are luckier than most.
You have wasted your opportunities in the world
thrown your many talents into dust.
It is now and has always been broken hearted love
that is the source, the goal and the perfection
of every life lived well.

April 10

There is a hollow in which I live
a creek running through it that will flood
in April.
We can allow a heart to take form inside of emptiness.
It will open and accept every face as its own.
First pretend to be a person
then feel a Presence separate from your self.
Begin to love this Presence as if it is another.
All to make an opening, so what is Real
can enter as a breath
that will blow away every structure of belief.
Allows the Real to be perceived and held
to what extent a human being can.
As Robin Williamson sings, “Whatever you think
it’s more than that.”

April 11

There is an Existence alive and conscious of itself
moving within the single wide trailer of the body.
It comes as a great wind
taking down walls, breaking windows
blowing doors off of their hinges.
For those who have ears, it speaks. For those who have eyes, it appears.
For those with heart, it opens inside them
a blossom whose nectar is blood.

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8 thoughts on “APRIL 2015

  1. A bit frustrating to read poems all in the same post, like when I first split them up for you. They seem like one poem, not that that’s a bad thing.

    “To be intoxicated with God is alright
    but it is still an intensity of ego
    just as joy and rage are both intensities of Awe.
    Here, where we are now
    is where the love is.”

    Not so sure I agree with this, although it has its place. Not just ego–not the real intoxication–and not just Here. But you know that.

    “If anyone strikes my heart, it does not break, but it bursts, and the light issuing forth becomes a torch on my path.” Inayat Khan

    • Could be just a difference in definition. In my tradition, ANY thought, no matter what its quality, is an indication of ego. That aside, anything I have learned or received from my Grandfather will always be considered the highest truth, even if it’s wrong. 🙂

      • Every entity, every object and particle of Creation is considered a form of “thought”, indicating an ego at work. Pure Advitans deny the existence of the world, thereby denying the existence of a Creator or Divine Ego. My preference is that the creation is real and that there is a Divine Persona behind it all, even if I have a bone to pick with Him/Her about a few things. I wouldn’t call the love I have for my Grandfather sentimental. Even if I disagreed with him on certain points, I would be willing to live in a universe that conformed exactly to his understanding, just to see and walk with him again.

      • Every impulse is divine at its origin…including sentiment. My grandfather was a mean old bugger who abused his wife and children, so little sentiment can I find for him, I can tell you. I envy anyone with a blood relative they have real respect for.

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